You Lose…You Win

by Jennifer on June 16, 2008

Monday, June 17th, 2008

If you love something…let it go.

If it is meant to, it comes back to you…

Such simple words to contain such an unbelievable secret, and incredible mystery. I used to think these words were a consolation only, something to comfort yourself with when you could no longer hope to have what you once dreamed of…but that was many, many years ago.

That was before I had had the chance to find out about the good side of giving up…giving in. Giving over. Giving over to a bigger wave in the universe when it has clearly swept you up and you are fighting it, thinking that somehow the universe hasn’t heard your prayers or understood you properly. You feel that to let go in that moment would mean letting go of what matters so much to you…but then the moment finally comes when you just have to give up anyway. You have worked all the fight out of yourself. You let go of all the holding in your tight muscles, and you give in to the wave…and then, just when you think it is all over…it takes you someplace.

It doesn’t just take you someplace, in fact, but exactly where you wanted to go in the first place…or better.

Ironically, it is usually the times that I truly have given up, and maybe even grieved because I have let go so entirely of something I wanted so much, that I find that most sacred surprise. That I find that the universe had it in store for me all along…that my intuition was right about it coming into being…I just had to let go first.

So often in the metaphysical world we focus on holding the intention (an absolutely vital and imperative step to be sure) and very little on letting go of it afterward. We are supposed to inhale, yes…but then exhale too…and to do this over and over again. Hold, and let go. If we do it often and fast enough we see the greater rhythm and picture behind it all…and they feel like two parts of one body…one whole cycle. A grief is always going to bring a new life…no matter how unlikely. A loss is always going to bring some kind of ultimate win. We just won’t always know it when we let go…it is part of what makes the letting go so deep.

Because when we finally figure out that the universe isn’t going to leave us alone and wanting forever, no matter what…we begin to understand how really loved we are. And then we can let go in a whole new way…the way someone lets go when they know they are loved. Loved, looked after, cared for and adored. We begin to understand that our needs are always going to be met…are always being met in each moment. The universe loves us so much that it will even help us meet the difficult circumstances we have asked for as souls in order to heal and open even more to the incredible brilliance inside of us. But never, not for one second, does it leave us alone. There is no moment in the existence of all things that we are not adored, held, and watched over. We just don’t always know it.

So when you let go of something, with trust and courage, you are opening more widely to receive, and making a space for the universe to show you that it knows exactly how to give you what you need and want. We are leaving the process in very capable hands…hands we cannot see…and leaning back into the chair of emptiness and love, both at once. We are curling up inside a warm, invisible place, and telling the universe we are ready to heal, to be held, and to trust. We don’t have to do it all by ourselves. For we are the universe, and to try to work without it is like not using our own beautiful limbs, or heart.

I know…I know weary warriors…we want to win the battle we have been fighting all our lives, and for so many before. We don’t want to surrender. We don’t realize it is the way to win. But it isn’t because we don’t really know or trust that in our hearts. It is because we have been fighting the good fight on this planet for so frigging long we just don’t know any other life anymore. We have stood alongside one another, and watched one another fall. We have made the most of nothing but potatoes, and small rations, and cold nights. We have been fighting the fight of the light. And now we can just be the light.

But what will we do with our skills?…we wonder. How will I put to use the hardy and hard-earned prowress and strength? What did we win with all of our effort and blood? Who did we protect and what did we save? We saved the very heart we built up the fire in to fight with…we saved what is within. And where will we put all the energy we invested?…in finding, and then reveling, in the joy. Because it is coming, even in the face of the old world passing. And we will need all the presence we have ever known as beings in order to really experience that kind of bliss. It is what we worked and waited for. Now we just have to prepare to receive it. By letting go.

There is no special way to do it. You can keep your sword, and your shield. They will look good hanging on the wall above your hearth fire…as relics of a world long gone, in a time that most will have, blessedly, forgotten. We will be the storytellers again, and we will sit together…those of us who remember now will remember it all then too…and look deep into each other’s eyes, and maybe cry a little…and definitely laugh.

See you there.

Love, Jennifer

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