Tuesday, June 5th, 2006
I know how it goes. Some days you are on top of the clouds and everyone understands you. The Universe is reading your mind and you know all that your heart desires will be provided. You just “know” that you will be blessed and that you will always have kindred spirits by your side.
But that isn’t every day for all of us. For many of us, if not all, there are other days. The days when every eye is empty, when it seems that there isn’t someone who could read your mind even if it were written across your forehead. On those days a cloud passes over the sun and casts a shade on even the brightest things in your life. And even if you have learned to weather the storms by lighting a candle, planting a rose, having a cup of deeply nurturing tea by the window…there are still the moments it gets to you. You wonder if you will ever be understood and if anyone ever means a thing they say. You wonder if you ever do find the ultimate port in the storm, will it be just you there? Are you the only one who knows?…
On those days it seems that the beings and the angels have other things to do, that they can’t hear you through the glass of your doubt. I can’t quantify what I am about to tell you, and I will only be able to prove it to you when we meet in heaven, but you are not the only one…and you will not end up alone. Right now, while you don’t know it, the beings and the universe of love are conspiring together in secret meetings to get you more love, more passion, more joy. They are trying to figure out how to put you in the path of the showers of blessings that rain goodness everywhere…they are trying to put you in front of the love of your life, or your next best friend, or keep you there if you are already. They are conspiring over how to get you some more money so that you can fulfill your dreams and live a creatively free life.
They are finding ways to drop signs in your path to remind you of how fantastically brilliant and beautiful you are. They are trying to make the colors brighter and the tastes sweeter, and if you have been in the darkest of places they are trying to give you warm blankets and hot soup to get you back on your feet. We may not understand the pain until it is gone, but there is only one remedy in the meantime and it is faith. It is all that helps a broken heart when new reasons to love haven’t come yet. And even when our hearts are not broken, just heavy and lonely in this often-alien human world, faith is something that grows between the cracks in the concrete. It isn’t something that we can force, it is something that forces its way through those hard places and gives us oxygen when we are just about to give up.
There are so many things in this world that ask us to harden. They sing the same song over and over again, telling us to close down and never open up again…but we have a stronger song within us…more ancient and more true, that is always begging us to fly, to try, to risk, to rise. Sometimes we have to tell ourselves a little white lie, until it isn’t one anymore, and everything really is going to be alright. Better, in fact. Everything is going to be grand, by nature, and sooner or later, whatever hurts or loneliness you’ve experienced, life is going to find just the right thing to sweep you off your feet again. There are others. Keep walking forward, they are already coming toward you now.
