Your True Name

by Jennifer on March 4, 2021

Monday, March 3rd, 2021

Longing, far more than it haunts you,

reminds you of your true name.

~ Cooper Edens

I suppose longing doesn’t seem like it matters much anymore, and perhaps when it did, it only appeared to cause you pain.  But longing is the friend we have forgotten…the only friend who knows our true name.

Without our true name, we have no clear direction and respond blindly to any name we are called.  Without our true name, no matter how deeply we are drawn to a life of meaning and joy, it feels as though our energy leaves us through a hole in our field we can’t quite seem to close.  But there is a fire that is always warm in the coldest night.  We may be concerning ourselves so firmly with survival that we don’t realize it’s glow is what we need, even as we hurriedly rub sticks together to try to create a spark while the flame we are striving for already burns brightly.  We just have to know where to look for it…

Perhaps you are already so tired of looking that it seems a tease for me to even bring it up.  You’d rather do anything else but continue a search you feel left you with nothing but dust and empty hands.  I am here to make it easier…I am here to tell you that the key to the door it seems impossible to open is to be found in one place:

It is underneath the ache of the yearning, and the pain of loss. 

There, where you still have lust for life.  Uncovering it is only for the bravest of souls, and among the finest works of any lifetime.

I am here to tell you that under a blanket of snow, the seed lives on.

And the seed is what you really, deeply want.

Longing is a guide.  It is a guide that will show you your north star, your next step, your greatest dream and the way to bring it to life in a design so perfect that it is likely to unfold in a way far more beautiful than you planned or imagined. 

Longing will show you what you need, at the soul level, and what will make you blossom.  And it will do this not just by providing a compass, but by driving you directly into the situations that help you heal the pain that keeps you from feeling your desire, and experiencing its fruition.

Your hunger might be the greatest healing message you could ask for.

You may have transferred your hunger from things that nourish you to things that numb you so that you could survive.  That’s a perfectly natural response to pain when there are no better options, (like being loved deeply through it and having a natural grief process when we experience loss…a rare experience in the world as it is today.)  There is nothing wrong with letting numbness step in as your dance partner when you need it to.  It can be a friend too.

But longing will always keep knocking at your door, promising to tell you the secrets you so dearly wish to know, if you would but let it in again…when you are ready…with all its pain and revelations.  And one day, when you have grown so empty from the numbness that you are willing to risk again, you will open that door, and longing will come in, sit down for tea, and show you the way.

It may take time for longing to show you.  It may take time for you to trust it enough to let it guide you, and for you to understand its language again.  But if you make room for it, one day on the hundredth cup of tea, it will lean in and tell you your true name…and your life will never be the same again.

The gatekeeper to accessing our longing is our ability to take risks.  We are never so poor as when we can’t afford to take risks.  But we are also never so wise as when we know that for the moment we can’t.  There is no greater wisdom than trusting what we know is right for us within.  If you have no room for risk, honor that.  Wait, under a cloudy night sky, trusting the healing you are doing, until stars begin to peek out from behind the clouds once more and you realize there is room to try again.

Heal, rest, stay closed as long as you need to.  And when you realize the cocoon has become to tight to hold you and you have outgrown it, dare to open your new wings.

Because I promise you that as unimportant as your longing may seem in the scope of global events and large scale suffering, you cannot imagine how much the world needs your wings.  If we cannot dream anymore, we can’t dream the ways out of the unthinkable.  We need magic to do what we need to do next.

So here is the map to buried treasure and what I recommend if this message is speaking to you…

First, you must find a window of time to reconnect with yourself.  Carve out an hour, or a few of them if you can, and make an inviolable date with yourself.  If you have a schedule, put it in there.  If you can’t do it now, schedule it out.  If you need to move it, no worries, move it.  If you don’t want to wait, make it 15 minutes and schedule it before bed tonight.  But if you’ve got more time, go somewhere you really want to be…a place in nature or the window seat in a busy cafe.  Whatever you like.  (Or if all you can do is climb into a big closet and close the door, or draw a bath and lock the bathroom, that’s great too.) 

Bring a piece of paper or just answer this in your mind: what is one thing I really, really want?  Not maybe or kind of.  Something you want in a burning way.  If you can’t find something, just explore things you used to want or might.  If you are in a space where you want nothing and that feels perfect, wonderful.  Just be with that and wait until the next time a longing appears like a firefly in your heart.  You’ll know.

Don’t edit your longing.

Though not editing your longings alone can be a lifetime pursuit.  Try anyway.

If you long for something you can’t have or don’t have right now, well…that’s why it’s a longing.  But that’s also why it hurts sometimes to long…especially for something you have longed for for a very long time.  It may make you feel abandoned by the universe or unworthy of having your desires come to fruition or your dreams come true.  That’s part of the pain coming up for healing.  If it gets unbearable, it’s perfectly good to change your focus and come back to this another time.

When you have your one longing, ask yourself what that longing tells you about yourself.  Then find a way to celebrate that part of yourself.  It will help to heal your pain and show you your next step in life.

For instance, if you long for a friend, you might notice that you are a person who deeply values connection and intimacy.  If you long for a lover perhaps it also means you are a passionate person who values not only connection and intimacy but your sexuality as well.  If you long for these things deeply perhaps you are being asked to honor that you have a great appetite for these kinds of connection because you have a great gift as well.  And even if you haven’t been able to explore these gifts as fully as you would like to yet in this life, it doesn’t mean that you won’t.  It’s never, ever too late.

Maybe you long to travel but it’s restricted, or you don’t have the funds right now or have children to take care of, or a job without flexibility (or all of the above).  You then my friend may be a great wanderer, an explorer…someone open to and craving new experiences…someone who brings a fresh perspective to anything you do.  This may be how longing is showing you your true name, and if you keep listening to the longing it may show you how to experience those gifts without travel for now, and light the way to how you might be able to travel more in the future.

See if you can connect to the ways your longings make you beautiful.  The ways your longings reveal your gifts.  See if you can create a new dream or feel a new direction or new kind of guidance by embracing these aspects of yourself.  If it feels good to do so, create a tiny ritual or celebration where you do something small that gives you the feeling you are craving.  Then pay attention to dreams, messages, signs or new opportunities shortly after you make this connection with more of your “true name”.

If you can’t hear longing over the deafening sound of the pain and stress you are enduring, that is more valid than I can possibly say.  I think, honestly, that is the experience of the majority of the people in the world right now.  My advice in that case would be to practice being as gentle as you can with yourself right now, and if you get a spare moment, use it to rest…even if its just closing your eyes and taking a breath when you can…even if it’s just taking a moment to look out at the cloudy skies, and see if any stars have appeared yet.  One day they will, and you will be ready.

I promise that you have not been forsaken by the universe, even when it seems as though that is the only possible explanation for where you are now or what has happened in your life.  One day when you least expect it, the sprouts of things you dreamed of long ago may burst out of the ground you thought was barren, and begin to spring to life.  One day, you may come face to face with a flower as big as your face, and it may make you laugh like a child, as you suddenly remember your true name.

Love,

Jennifer

Love this writing? Hop on my email list to receive each new post!

Also, if you love this writing you will adore my online courses…click here to see them!

{ 0 comments }

2021: A Vision of Hope ~ an Oracle’s Prophecy

by Jennifer on November 3, 2020

Jennifer Luna Posada
November, 2020

These are the moments we need Oracles for… 

I have lived through many of them.  I have seen many worlds end.  I have midwived them to the other side.  But this time the world is not ending.  It is shapeshifting…

Shapeshifting causes endings too…because you do not come out in the same form you went in…but you live through.  You transform.  There is alchemy, forced by necessity.  A deeper nature comes out.  And this is what will happen to our world.  There will be losses.  There already have been.  But some things are never lost, and these losses will be the makings of new stars…the seeds of new beginnings that have been long destined…

We only have to be able to survive the shapeshifting.  It isn’t easy, but it is more rewarding than any other endeavor.  It is the shapeshifting of love taking us back to our true essences, by unraveling all the darkness that has long been spun.  It will be scary to watch it unravel, mostly within us…but there are tools for shapeshifting, and I can help you remember them.

It’s why I kept the memory all this time.  It’s what Oracles are for.

To shapeshift we are going to need:

  1. fuel
  2. to reopen the lines to our inner knowing

To do these two things we are going to need to:

  1. learn to build energy within
  2. reconnect with our bodies more deeply
  3. reconnect with our magical gifts

Over nearly 16 years of teaching about this I have heard people say almost more than anything else that they wish to remember their gifts…their special soul abilities, their purpose.  It used to be the dream to access these gifts, now it’s going to be the imperative.

We are going to need these soul gifts to survive.  Perhaps not to actually survive…though that’s possible as well, but to dredge the magical knowing from deep beneath the human conditioning, profound wounding, and massive-scale trauma in order to shapeshift as we will need to.

It’s time to heal.

Like never before.

And in a way we’ll never quite know the likes of again, because we will never quite need to.

In my song “Avalon” I wrote…

Do you remember where we met by the well,
where the stories were told and the power would swell?
Where we kneeled to say prayers that were never spoken,
in a land where the promise could never be broken.
 
Do you remember in the final hour,
how the time had come and we gave up our powers?
How we laid down the stones and the robes were burned,
until the day would come when we swore we’d return…

This is that day.

It’s okay to be afraid.  But there is no need to be too afraid.  We planned this.  We have been preparing for this, at levels we are not even aware of yet.  But we are going to become more and more aware of them…especially those of us who are sensitive, empathic, open.  We will feel it first. It is going to start bursting through in our dreams, in symbolism around us, in our connections with each other.

To access most deeply these signs and visions, as I have shared, you are going to need your gifts, and you are going to need to reconnect with your body and the infinite energy in it.  

I know…some of you are thinking, oh god anything but in the body.  Scariest cave of all.  Perhaps right now especially. But it is the place filled with the most riches too. The ones you most want and need.  And if you want to stop reading now because you think my approach won’t work for you because you are sick and in pain, hang on just an extra moment or two…

See, I spent over a decade in the underworld of illness and pain so that I would know for sure what I am talking about. Like the Goddess Innana, I chose to go down there and explore it willfully, so that I could understand the furthest reaches of suffering and know that even there the flame can be lit within and kept burning, and furthermore that it could be made so much stronger by that experience.

I once wrote there are special muscles that you gain from crawling out of hell, but that you usually only gain by crawling out over and over again for a long time. When they are strong enough you get to move on, and then you get to keep them forever. They allow you to do things you could never otherwise have done. They give you superpowers from the deepest parts of your soul.

As I’ll explain later there are also ways to gain superpowers from beauty and gentleness, and that is the shift we are learning to make now…but always know that your journeys through hell mattered, and still matters. You gained or are gaining gifts you may not even have experienced yet. Climbing out of hell over and over again may be what has given you back your wings.

To access your superpowers…your deepest soul gifts, and your ability to shapeshift for these coming times, you are going to have to do one thing…

You are going to have to learn to access and build energy from within, because this is the fuel you need. Our fuel tanks are mostly empty and it is time to refuel, and then reopen the lines to our deepest knowing.

Learning to access and build energy from within also both draws you inward and draws you into your body, helping to reveal and fuel your gifts…covering all the bases with one act. But a key is that ideally the way you build energy within has to have an element of joy or pleasure or it won’t naturally draw you in and compel you back to it again and again. Especially in these crucial times, there must be a semi-immediate reward, even if it is subtle. We need the medicine as we go, not at some later date when we “achieve” the next level of mastery.

I know that this does not reflect the ancient traditions of many cultures and spiritualities as we know them. Many spiritual practices tend to have to do with enduring and overcoming hardship. And there is great beauty in that…the butterfly becoming the caterpillar. But we have learned a lot through hardship and need to remember now how to also learn as we did in an even more ancient time, through softness, sweetness, love and pleasure.

We have come to think of these qualities of experience as less powerful and I am here to assure you that there are no more powerful qualities than these. Even the hardships were only designed to bring us back to them because these qualities describe the experience of our true nature when we have returned to it.

I am aware that as things stand in the world, even before the events of this year, a return to these qualities has seemed nearly impossible to reach, and perhaps even like a cruel joke to mention. A night of sleep, an hour to oneself, a day without pain or grief, a true experience of our deeper knowing, even for a moment…perhaps even these things have seemed utterly unobtainable.

But we are going to find room now. Room is going to be made by the cracking and breaking of our former lives as we have known them, and by the cracking and breaking of the former world and its systems. This may be the greatest gift of the breakdown. It will make us realize we can’t live as we were living, and will crack open new spaces ultimately for vibrant growth, transformation, and new energy.

It will make us realize that we need to live more like animals, because that is what we are. We will have to take care of our bodies in new ways because they will show us that is the only hope for continuing to function. We will have to unplug more from what doesn’t serve us and find and take care of each other, even in small groups or over a distance, to make this transition possible and light up a new world.

Yes, I am saying now anyway. Connect with others in ways that feel safe, and shine your light. (First build it, then shine it…your glow means everything.) We all need that now more than ever. There are some people who will leave your life now or already recently have. Unless you get inner guidance otherwise to take other steps, let go and trust it. You are aligning or will align with the ones you are most meant to for this momentous transition point on the earth. So focus on the ones who stay, or who arrive soon.

Another important element of the coming times is that your secret longings are going to illuminate the path to a new vision and a new land. The things that stand in the way of you moving toward them will be moved away until there is nothing left but the flame that you are, shining brightly into the darkness.

It’s time to take instruction. From within.

But as I have said, first we need the fuel, and then we have to open back up the lines.

There is another mostly untapped resource we have for accessing our superpowers, getting the fuel we need to shapeshift, building our inner energy, shining our light in connection with others, and reopening the lines to our knowing, body wisdom and soul gifts, and it is our sexual energy. As I recently wrote,

…whether you are in touch with it or not there is a warm, glowing bed of embers inside of you, just waiting to catch flame and ignite your life.

Before I go on let me address the obvious. Unless you are a highly sexual creature I do understand that sex, as we generally think of it, may be the last thing on your mind. If you need to be focused on basic survival, or grief, or health concerns, or the state of the world, or the myriad other stressors pummeling down our doors, then you might be laughing (or wanting to cry) at my even mentioning it. Understandably so.

But I am not talking directly about sex right now, (though that’s a welcome inclusion in the subject I am talking about with immensely healing potential for those who engage in it now too.) I am talking about sexual energy. The creative and boundless source of life force that we have all been taught to fear and repress, or access only during sexual activities but that holds the key to a return to vitality and vision.

And I am not just talking about any little boost in vitality and vision that would feel like some small bonus, no…I am talking about the absolutely critical elements we need right now to make it through this shift in the world.

Whether or not we choose to let this also be explored in a sexual way with another human is not the most important focus now…the most important focus is that we need to regain access to our lifeforce.

We need our lifeforce back so we can shapeshift, and we need to be able to shapeshift to survive the coming changes. When we have a reservoir of our life force we can call on it when it is needed, and use it to enter the realms of magic within us.

The best thing to do now to build this reservoir and access our life force again, which then allows us to open the lines to our inner knowing and magical gifts, is to use any practices you have to help you access that pure life energy.  These could be something like breathing practices of various kinds, walking outside, dancing or movement practices…use your favorites, preferably as often as possible or as feels right to you at this time.

If you don’t currently have a practice you use to build life force, or wish to learn more, the most potent practices I can offer are the ones I teach in my online Energy Orgasm Course, they heal you as you practice them and while you may decide to use them to learn to have “energy orgasms” just using them to build energy is a magical and life changing process. They also can be incorporated into your daily activities or other practices so that they don’t take more from your precious time…they only give.  They will utterly transform your life.

In whichever way you do it building your life force matters now, because when the dust settles in 2021, many things will be revealed. You will be asked to step out on a limb for what you most deeply feel and believe in…and most importantly what your soul aches for and always has. That will be a little different for each of us, but you likely want some things in common with all of us: connection, with your deepest self, with your body, with your intuition and knowingness, and with others who are like you…connection with your gifts, and your magic.

And, in 2021, we will need magic and be ready for more than ever, and need it to help us shapeshift into a new world…magic will be called out of us, and we will allow it to be. Our gifts will be called upon. The more tools we have now and the more we build our energy and connection to our inner knowing, the more smoothly and profoundly this will occur.

We can still light up the world with love. It starts inside and by finding it there even when things are falling apart all around you. Find what sustains you inside, and then share it with others whenever you can. That is how we will light the light again. That it how we will light the signal fires again to let each other know…it’s time. It’s the time we waited for. It’s time to remember, it’s time to heal, it’s time to let an old world die, and watch a new one be born. It’s time to have the hidden magic called out of us, and live by its guidance.

The fountain of youth, the ocean of healing, the holy grail, the keystone, the sacred scriptures, the hidden way, the truest alchemy, the magical gifts, the promised land, the answers to all, the comfort with the unknown, the trust in love, it is all within. And when we find it within and share it, where we thought no way could open, the new way is shown.

Love,

Jennifer

Love this writing? Hop on my email list to receive each new post!

Also, if you love this writing you will adore my online courses…click here to see them!

{ 0 comments }

The Gestation: 2020 ~ An Oracle’s Prophecy

April 3, 2020

Jennifer Luna PosadaApril, 2020 Take heart, for what now seems sudden, shocking, heralds instead from the deep and the ancient…a place you know in the marrow of your bones and of your very soul. We called this. We called this because this will bring the medicine for a wound the world didn’t know how to […]

Read the full article →

The Reinvention: 2020 ~ An Oracle’s Prophecy

November 8, 2019

November 5th, 2019 Deep in the darkened, ancient hills of magic, the fireflies of remembrance glow…you slowly open your eyes from a great slumber and remember this land, remember this glow. You remember the plan you made so long ago that you had forgotten. You shed the path you thought you knew, and open to […]

Read the full article →

Forty

April 5, 2019

Wednesday, March 6th, 2019 For my fortieth birthday this year, I threw a 90s-themed dance party. It was a costume party, so people showed up in all the styles that to me in the 90s were just clothing. And I re-created an outfit I would have loved to have worn to a party then. (See […]

Read the full article →

2019: Coming Back To Life ~ An Oracle’s Prophecy

October 30, 2018

Jennifer Luna Posada November, 2018 They came like water…the visions…the knowing just poured over me in warm waves.  The other day I suddenly just understood, as I lay in bed, as I walked down the hallway, as I had my shower…so many things about my life and path that I hadn’t before, despite my long […]

Read the full article →

Just to be a Creature

October 1, 2018

Monday, September 10th, 2018 For Gibson I used to burn sage. Now I ask people, kindly, if they would mind putting it out…so I can breathe.  So I don’t have the leave the space we are in together… I think about the elegance of it all.  The perfection of my grand sensitivity, masquerading as weakness, […]

Read the full article →

When I Let Go…

August 13, 2018

Friday, August 6th, 2018 I dreamt about my grandmother’s house again. The small home that seems to sprawl in my mind…the drawers and cupboards spilling their contents out if even slightly provoked. The entire building felt like a time capsule, since it was hard for my grandmother to let almost anything go. So it has […]

Read the full article →

Time to Refresh: Mid-2018 Eclipses ~ An Oracle’s Prophecy

July 16, 2018

Jennifer Luna Posada July, 2018 In the wake of a fresh new moon and solar eclipse, there is a silence.  A pause…but one covered in frantic, intense energies, obscuring that precious pearl of new knowing you attained by moving through recent deeply transformational energies.  Your boat has been rocked, rocked again, and perhaps even struck […]

Read the full article →

When You Speak Your Truth

May 4, 2018

Wednesday, May 2nd, 2018 “If someone backs away when you speak your truth…let them.” ~ Jennifer Posada “some people, when they hear your story, contract. others, upon hearing your story, expand. and this is how you know.” ~ nayyirah waheed I am going to tell you a great secret… In this world it is unlikely […]

Read the full article →