Monday, December 8th, 2008
Looking back is an interesting thing for me. I can see so far when I look toward the horizon of time that the my many lives look like waves in an immense ocean. And when I focus closer in I see a life that seems unreal…a dream I dreamed one long night. How could my life really have contained so much? Surely reality is an interpretation. Looking at all of this beauty, whose marks of pain even look exquisite from here, I am reminded…no matter my concerns, that my future too will always be touched by this grace. It is what lives beneath everything, even those things whose surfaces do not show it.
I am asked often what I see. What I see for the future of the world. I see magic. I see magic being born into matter from the center of our hearts. That is where we will find peace…in the center of our hearts. All we must do is remember that the things that draw us away from that center need not, and if they do it is always only to draw us back. Then we can stop being hard on ourselves for living.
Because when all else fails, and the night is long, you can know that all you are feeling is worth something. It isn’t senseless and mistaken. It is your soul finding liberation through life…and it will indeed find it. This life can be brutal…completely and heart-breakingly brutal. But the sweetness is even more relentless, no matter how long we sometimes wait it will find us out. It will search for us through lifetimes and pound us harder with bliss than we imagined we could ever know. It will re-create us…we are re-creating ourselves.
Get ready to blossom. Get ready for all the repression of the seed walls and the growing pains of the sprouting to fade. Get ready for the sun to dissolve your defenses. Life is coming to show you why you came, and what it was all for. In the meantime make art. Make it with your body, your heart, and your mind. Make it with your moments, your face, and your habits. Make it with your words, and your gestures, and your choices. Rise when you are called by the diety of your soul, and fall when the wave releases you and there is nothing to do but give in. And then give in with everything you have.
You are being reborn…again. Many will gather to witness the birth of your new light in the world. Let them watch. You will be fascinated even by yourself. The miracle is in you. Rest now. Make a soft space in your mind and a respite in your heart. You have done well, and the rest is up to the universe. It will come.
Love, Jennifer
